(no subject)
kelly8191
I've been so busy lately. I played Moon by George Winston on piano for solo & ensemble night on tuesday, and tonight i played Schumann's Romance No. 3 on oboe. My band is recording 3 songs for a demo tape tomorrow night and hopefully that will go over okay. I think our band name is going to be "The Situation" because we're all a bunch of sick fucks and thought it would be funny to name something after Jersey Shore. Anyways my hair is a fucking mess and I need to take a shower. Also, I'm dating that idiot douchebag fuck Danny again, but this time I actually love that fucker. Well I mean, I liked him before. But he is really the cheese to my macaroni now. He is my best frand and the lahvlahvlahv of my life. Shoot me. Actually Valentine's day is coming up soon and I'm probably going to get him a ton of buffalo sauce because that's how much I hate him. But honestly I have no idea what I'm getting him. Suggestions would be nice...

Writer's Block: Tonight, tonight
kelly8191
If you celebrate Christmas, what will you do this evening? If you don't, will you still do something festive or is it just another night?

this evening i will be suffering through dinner with my dysfunctional family and opening a few presents from them and then probably fapping to images of dillon

(no subject)
kelly8191
An update on my life:
lately all's i enjoy is food, sex, incense, and weed.
i got accepted into a few colleges and i think i'm going to mcphs because i got accepted into nursing with a scholarship.
christmas is tomorrow and i am excited.

Writer's Block: The Tech Effect on Education
kelly8191
How has technology’s constant presence affected your (or your child’s) education?
I spent ages 11-14 literally addicted to a computer screen. It ended up being a problem because I was a huge dork and couldn't get off this Nancy Drew forum for the life of me. During middle school my lack of interest for real life became even worse. I could never get homework done because I was constantly busy distracting myself. So yeah, the internet ruined my life and my distaste for real life turned me into a depressed kid at like 12 years old. The internet sucks man.

Writer's Block: Go it alone
kelly8191
Do you think society puts too much pressure on people to be in relationships and/or have children? Do you think this ostracizes people who would be perfectly content to remain single and/or child-free? Is this pressure worse around the holidays?
Definitely. Because I definitely don't want the commitment of a relationship. I feel like relationships are way too rushed. I'd rather just be close to someone and have them understand where I'm coming from. It's difficult for me because no one comes close to being as much of a soul mate to me as Shay was. It's difficult to replace, but time seems to heal it. Now it seems as though I'm wandering around aimlessly only experiencing instantaneous pleasures rather than long term ones. I'm just going to keep waiting. And I don't see anything wrong with that.

(no subject)
kelly8191
I just don't understand. Why am I such a terrible person? I don't think I am, but it seems like other people do. I don't understand how someone can forget about all the great times we had and then just talk badly about me. It really sucks, because I cared so much about this person, and now he doesn't care about me. Probably to the extent where he wouldn't care if I was dead or not. That's how badly I sense this is. And he tries to make it seem like its too late for me to apologize, but I'm not really sure what I should be apologizing for. It's almost like I can never win. I'll always be misunderstood. It's the things like these that have a huge impact on me. Nothing hurts quite like thinking you know someone when you don't.

(no subject)
kelly8191
Have you ever had one of those moments in life where you've been so happy you just started crying? I just thought of a time when that happened. I remember when I saw Kevin again for the first time in 3 months. I thought I was never going to see/talk to him again, but then he just hugged me on his bed for at least 10 minutes and we just held each other. A bunch of memories and thoughts came back to me and I felt so overjoyed I think I might've shed a tear or two. This sounds really gay and sappy to be sharing on livejournal, but if I die before I'm supposed to, I want people to know all of my thoughts without having to guess at what thoughts were significant to me. I mean how is a book ever of interest to you if you've never opened it before?

(no subject)
kelly8191
Yesterday was kind of a chain of unfortunate events. First I get into a car accident. It wasn't a big deal I just kinda rear ended someone but nothing bad happened. But naturally of course I start crying afterwards and I call up Danny and I'm all like, wah wah wah, and he's like dude cheel. So then everything was okay, and I went home and played the Sims 3. Afterwards I went to hangout with Danny, then I get a call from Kevin and Lionel and I hang out with them afterwards. Long story short, my car won't start in the Denny's parking lot. Awesome. It ended up starting but I concluded that I need to stop driving a car. Also, I have black hair now. I guess I like it. Wow I certainly wish life was exciting during the school year. I really need to do something mind blowing.

(no subject)
kelly8191
On Saturday I modeled at SOPHA and made 90 dollars. It was for a photo lighting class and they needed models so I said I'd do it. It was a pretty good day. I met Asphyxia that day, who is pretty much one of the hottest/best models around right now in my opinion. She was only there cause she needed some money,  otherwise she'd be way too good for that but it was cool meeting her. Most of the people in the class that took photos of me were older people and it was a little awkward at first, but otherwise it was alright and loosened up a bit as we went along. I hope I get some photos emailed to me soon. If not I'll just ask Brian for a few that I liked. I dunno what he was up to today, I'm assuming he was taking photos or interning. I should be studying right now, but instead I'm too distracted. It fucking snowed today, what the fuck?

(no subject)
kelly8191
I hate when you're all cooped up and anti social for a few days and then you ask that one person that means a lot to you to hang out and they're all like no I don't have time I'm doing this that and whatever and they haven't even talked to you at all this week and it just sucks. I dunno I just hate having all of the feelings from the past still there and not being able to control them. I just don't want to deal with my emotions being rejected. I didn't ask the world from you, I just wanted you to be there for me without making me feel like an irrational cunt. You're the only person that makes me cry and it sucks. :(

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